Learning to Live
by ToxicTopaz
Summary: When the fireworks went off, it was like their minds were cleared. The four troubled teens realized who they were, what they wanted, and what they were supposed to do...but could they handle it? Could they push past what they had been raised to believe, and learn to live their lives the way they wanted to? Feddie/Joytricia Multi-Chap. Rated T for language/future sexy times.
1. Going Through the Motions

**A/N: Welp, that's another season ended! :( But that doesn't mean we can't still crack-ship! I couldn't decide between Feddie and Joytricia, so I decided to do a 2x2 Feddie/Joytricia fic! I hope all you crack-shippers enjoy it. Here I go~**

**Title: Learning to Live**

**Summary: When the fireworks went off, it was like their minds were cleared. The four troubled teens realized who they were, what they wanted, and what they were supposed to do...but could they handle it? Could they push past what they had been raised to believe, and learn to live their lives the way they wanted to? Feddie/Joytricia Multi-Chap. (Can also be read at on my Tumblr- havesomeconfeddie)**

**Words: 773**

**Rating: M (for language/sexy times)**

**Warnings: Homosexuality, smut in future chapters, poor language, possible future violence/self-harm pretty much what I say for all of my fics**

**Disclaimer: If Soren owned HOA, Feddie and Joytricia would have happened a long time ago. BAHAHAHA...**

* * *

"Wasn't that party grand?" Fabian asked Eddie as he pulled a t-shirt over his flushed face to sleep in.

"Yeah," Eddie said through a fake-yawn- an attempt to cover up a lie. Okay, so it wasn't a _complete _lie- it was nice to be able to spend time with friends after _saving the world, _but it just didn't feel…_right. _Patricia had been, in his opinion, a complete bitch the entire night. It was like she was going through the motions of being a whiney girl who just wanted endless attention from her boyfriend. Ugh…chicks. Eddie watched as Fabian tugged at the edges of his shirt, noticing the short boy's well-defined pecks showing through the tight, thin fabric. Squinting, he could see Fabian's nipples sticking out, too- _someone _was excited.

"Isn't Mara such a fun person to be around?" Fabian said as he crawled into bed, snapping Eddie out of his trance as he pulled the blankets around him. Eddie quickly mimicked his actions before replying.

"She…she's a pretty cool chick," he said, still out of breath from his small fantasy as he thought about it. Mara _was _pretty cool, even if she'd been a total bitch recently- but Eddie knew people could change. He was dating _Patricia, _how could he not have learnt that by now? "Are you sure you're over Nina yet?" he asked the moment he thought of it. Fabian and Nina had been pretty serious, and last time he checked, he still wasn't over her…

"You know what? I think I actually am," he said with a small smile. It was relieving to be set free. "I mean, I'm probably never going to meet her again," he finally admitted, "so what's the point of moping around just because she's not here?" He chuckled heartily, feeling completely at peace for the first time in months.

"You're right," Eddie said, emotions much the opposite of Fabian's, but hidden in the dark. "What's the point of being hung up over someone you can never have?" he asked, a hint of sadness evident in his voice. _"Fabian?" _he questioned again when there was no response. His hand was halfway to the bedside table to flick the light on when he heard snoring. Sighing heavily, Eddie sunk into his pillows in defeat. _He'll never feel the same way..._

* * *

"...because I know he's the one, Trixie!" Joy squealed excitedly through a mouth of toothpaste foam. "He just…he makes me feel so-"

"I get it, Joy," Patricia said with a sigh of annoyance as she braided her hair for bed. It wasn't fair to have to watch her _gorgeous _best friend fall in love with a guy while she had to go through the motions just to pretend she still liked her own boyfriend. "And it's great that Jerome gets you all hot and bothered, but I _honestly _couldn't give less of a fuck," she grunted. Joy, whose head was currently submerged in the sink as she rinsed her mouth out, quirked a brow at this odd behavior. She shut the water off and dried the sink with a towel before stepping out of the bathroom.

"What's wrong with you tonight_?" _she asked curiously, taking offense to the girls' bitterness. "I thought you'd be happy that your best friend found a great guy that actually _likes _her, and besides- didn't you have a great time with Eddie tonight?" Patricia nearly cried at the mention of Eddie, but held herself together for her the sake of her friend.

"I…I did," she lied as she pulled the covers of her bed round herself. "But…" she trailed off as she watched Joy flipping her hair over her head to wrap it in a bun. She noticed how Joy was only wearing boy-shorts to sleep- and they were _tight, _too. Another thing that was tight was her t-shirt, and she wasn't even wearing a bra.

"…Patricia?" she was snapped out of her trance by her friend walking over to her. "Whatever happened, it'll be okay," she said with a sweet smile, before climbing onto her friend's bed to give her a big hug. Joy smelled like strawberries, and her skin was smooth, too. Patricia could feel Joy's body rub up against hers as she pulled away

"Th-thanks, Joy," she said with a bittersweet smile on her face as her friend walked back to her own bed and shut off the light.

"Don't mention it, what are friends for?" Joy asked, yawning directly afterwards. "It's been a long day. G'night, Trixie."

"Night, Joy" Patricia whispered bitterly, turning on her side to sigh heavily. _If only we could be more than friends…_

* * *

**A/N: So, Soren hopes you liked her fic! :) Please review, subscribe, favorite, and all that jazz~! There's definitely more to come! If anyone has any ideas for future chapters or even a stand-alone one-shot, review or PM me, and I'll try to get to everyone! :3 **


	2. I'm Looking Through You

**A/N: Alright guys, I'm back, and I bear gifts! Thanks for the great reviews, everyone, both on FF and Tumblr! This chappy's a bit shorter than the first, considering there's no Joy to get Patricia all hot and bothered this time. xD I've realized recently that it takes a while to come up with new chapters when you're incorporating so many different things! So, if I ever don't update for a while, I either 1) died, 2) have a big update coming, 3) am busy as heck and can't be bothered, or 4) forgot/am being lazy and should be smacked up the side of the head by Sibunas and Feds and Joytricians everywhere. *shame* Also if I ever noticeably leave out one of the characters for a really long time tell me about it- I might do that at some point, considering there's ****_fifty billion _****character's on this show, so it's hard to keep track of them all.**

**ANYWAY- so ****_havesomeconfeddie! _****That's my tumblr, guys! :D You can read my fanfictions there if you go to the "Feddie Fanfiction" or "Joytricia Fanfiction" tags. Please follow! :D**

**Chapter Title: I'm Looking Through You. **

**Words: 515 (Yup, it's a short one! :3) **

**Chapter-Specific Warnings: NO JOY. As always, crack-shipping and homosexuality! And some language in this one~**

**Disclaimer: Please, if I owned HOA ****I would have gone all ****_Fifty Shades of Gay_**** on Sibuna's asses by now.**

* * *

"Morning, Weasel-Face," Patricia greets with the best fake smile she can muster.

"Morning, Yacker," Eddie follows along with an equally fake smile, bending down to push their lips together. The kiss is forced, bitter, and altogether wrong, and neither of them can get the color brown out of their heads.

"Morning, lovies!" Trudy says with a big smile from the kitchen table, where a majority of their friends are already seated. Eddie and Patricia sit down with sweaty hands still entwined. Mara and Fabian are giving each other love eyes across from them. It makes Eddie sick. Patricia glances around the table, noticing with relief that Joy isn't there yet. But the feeling fades away when she realizes that Jerome isn't there either.

"Where's Joy?" she asks her trademark question, glancing around the table for her once-again lost best friend.

"Oh, she left early with Jerome. He said he had a big surprise for her," Willow informs with a big smile and a mouth full of pancakes as Alfie rubs her arm. Patricia can feel her grip on the table cloth becoming tighter as she fumes internally, and Eddie's pretty close to puking watching Fabian make Mara blush with compliments about her writing. Patricia glances down at Eddie's plate, then back up to her faux-boyfriend. Even if she's not into him, she still loves him- as a friend.

"Eddie, you haven't touched your pancakes. You sure you're feelin' okay, slimeball?" She tries to ignore Willow's whispering to Alfie about how "cute" they are.

"Yeah, just- lost my appetite," he pushes the food around on his plate. He tries to ignore the sympathetic look Fabian is giving him from across the table. It just hurts to much that he's _such_ a good best friend, when all Eddie really wants to do is get in his pants.

"Hey, if you're having flashbacks, you can always talk to me." The voice belongs to KT, who is sitting at the head right next to Eddie, and has put her hand reassuringly on his shoulder.

"Thanks, KT," he says, smiling slightly. KT really is a good friend.

"Alright, kids, time to go to school!" Trudy pipes up from the kitchen. Everyone gets up from their chairs laxly, stretching their tired limbs and slowly making their way out the door. As Eddie walks by Fabian, he catches a whiff of his new cologne. It smells like the ocean- the fucking _ocean. _He's sighing with pleasure as he walks by.

"Uh, dude, do you mind?" Eddie's eyes shoot open and he backs away from Fabian.

"Ah, dude, sorry," he says, putting a hand behind his head to scratch it and flashing him an apologetic smile. Fabian looks at him like an angry jungle beast, glances at Mara, gives Eddie beast face, and then looks back to Mara again before walking out the door. Eddie facepalms at the realization that the only reason he was mad at him was because he was interrupting their schoolboy-schoolgirl flirt session.

"Eddie," Patricia grabs his arm, looking him square in the eyes seriously. "We need to talk."

* * *

**A/N: Once again, please review, follow, and give suggestions and or prompts for this story or any other story you want written! I'm always open to request, I actually ****_want _****them, so please- request away! Hope all y'all crack-shippers liked this update!~**

**Fabian got a little sassy in this one!**

**~Soren**


	3. Pretending

**A/N: I ACTUALLY UPDATED! :D**

**I'm sorry I took so long, guys. :( I got distracted with Jyder and Jalad love!~ :3**

**But anyway, here's your update! Thank you so much for you reviews, follows, and all that jazz! I was kind of waiting to get more review until I updated, because I wasn't sure if people were excited about it or not, but apparently they were! So of course I did some work.**

** Alright, guys, here it is!**

**Title: Pretending**

**Words: 1,010 (it's a long one! :D )**

**Chapter-Specific Rating: T**

**Chapter-Specific Warnings: Homosexuality, some sexual references, mild depression**

**Disclaimer: I own HOA like I have a boyfriend.**

**BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA**

* * *

Worry flashes across Eddie's eyes. _She knows._

"Whaddaya wanna talk about, Yacker?" he asks nervously, adding a fake chuckle for emphasis.

"Oh I dunno, maybe the love eyes you've been giving your roommate for two weeks straight?" she asks coldly, raising her brows as if she's waiting for an answer.

"I- I dunno what you're talking about," he lied, looking away. He was _such _a bad liar. Patricia could see right through him.

"Oh please Eddie, you were practically drooling over him this morning," she said coldly. He words cut like a knife through his chest.

"I'm sorry, Patricia," he said with a sigh. "I didn't mean to hurt you- _please don't tell anyone," _he pleaded as soon as he realized that possibility. Patricia was a cold-hearted bitch, that was for sure, but was she really _that _cold-hearted?

"Look, Eddie," she said quietly, looking around the room as if she was making sure no one else could hear them. "It's perfectly okay if you're gay- bi, whatever the hell you are. Either way…this just isn't working out," she said with a sigh. Her face was full of regret, as if she had a secret too. "I know your secret, so I guess it would only be fair if I told you mine…" Eddie quirked a brow at the statement. Patricia had a secret too? "I…I'm in love with Joy."

Eddie quirked a brow at this for a few seconds before a smile spread across his face. He'd seen the way she'd always looked at Joy- like a helpless little puppy admiring a goddess. He'd always just thought it was a weird chick thing, but now it all made sense.

"What are you smiling for?" Patricia asked him menacingly. "Do you think this is funny? "

"No," Eddie said with a small laugh. "I think it's adorable- I really should have figured it out by now."

"Oh," she said, relief washing over her face. "Are we still…uh-"

"Dating?" he asked, thinking about it for a few seconds. "It would probably be safest if we were- y'know, just for everyone else in the house."

"Good call," she said with a nod, before pulling him in for a hug.

"I'm really happy we can both be honest with each other," he said as he patted her back, feeling completely open and free with her, like a huge weight had been taken off his chest.

"Me too," she agreed, her emotions mirroring his as he slipped his hand into hers and they walked out the door. The second the door shut, Trudy poked her head out from the kitchen, stepping into the corridor to sweep with a smile on their faces.

_Puppy love, _she thought to herself as she swept up dust bunnies, _times two._

* * *

"Hey, sorry we're late, Dad!" Eddie called as the two teens ran into the classroom, still holding hands, and nearly tripping over each other to get to their seats as the bell rang.

"And where have you been, Mr. Miller and Ms. Williamson?" Mr. Sweet asked from his desk chair where he was reading attendance, and poked his head out to look at them sternly.

"We, uh-" Patricia stuttered, looking to Eddie for help.

"They stayed back at the house a while," came a soft, beautiful voice from the back of the room, full of hidden laughter and…_Joy. _"You know…coupley stuff." Patricia turned around to thank her friend. _She really is clueless… _

"Ah, well," Mr. Sweet said, clearing his throat. "Since you got here before the bell rang, I really can't punish you…but you better not disrupt my class again anytime soon."

Eddie glanced over at Fabian, who was too busy staring at Mara from behind to notice. He just wanted to make eye contact with him and say sorry about the morning, but Fabian didn't even take notice of him. After a few minutes of trying to win his friend's attention, he finally whimpered slightly. Maybe it was quiet, but by some Egyptian god's power Fabian felt compelled to glance his way. The moment he caught Eddie's glance, he glared at him. It broke Eddie's heart.

_"Hey," _Eddie mouthed to him. _"Sorry about this morning." _Fabian sighed heavily, tossing him a _"whatever" _and turning his attention back to Mara. Eddie suddenly felt pressure on his hand, and he looked down to see that Patricia was squeezing it.

_"Let it go," _she whispered. _"He's just being Fabian."_ Eddie nodded as he stared down at the worksheet before him, but still he couldn't seem to get the image of Fabian glaring at him out of his head. Was he really that _disgusted _by him?

And as much as Patricia denied it, she felt almost the same way about Joy. She knew Joy loved her more than anything and would _probably _give up her relationship with Jerome for her, but that was as a _friend. _If Joy figured out the way Patricia had been thinking of her all night -the dreams she'd been having of her, the way she was dying to know what was under her skirt- she would be absolutely disgusted. As much as Patricia tried to push that thought out of her mind, she knew it was true.

The rest of the day dragged on similarly for the two love-struck gay teens until lunch hour, which consisted of the two of them pecking at their meals as they watched their crushes fall in love with other people and held hands and pretended to laugh and joke around with their secret significant other. It was so tiring.

When they finally got home all they wanted to do was crawl into bed and die, but of course they couldn't do that. There was still homework to do, chores to do, a relationship to fake, and friends to talk to. But how long could they entertain themselves with that? How long would it be until they finally cracked under the pressure of living a lie? They were just pretending, in a world where people would do anything to know your secrets...

* * *

**So, I hope you guys enjoyed the update! Please review, follow, favorite, and all that jazz! And keep on crack-shippin'!**

**Oh, and I forgot to mention! Yes, every chapter title is a song, lol! :D**

**If anyone has any specific song they want used, send it to me or review it and I'll try to work it into a chapter. :3**


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